Lifes Questions
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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why are there only 10 hot dogs per pack, but the buns come in 8′s? If you have heard these questions and don’t have the answers, or have ever wondered the answers, then look no further. This section is full of questions that make you think outside the usual parameter, a break from the norm if you will, and discuss what you think the answers are. So, if you have any answers or would just like to discuss the questions, then feel free. If you have some good questions then let me know and I will post them for answers.
If you rape a prostitute, is it considered “shoplifting”?
If you don’t pay your exorcist, do you get repossessed?
If the scientist could make a radio out of two coconuts, why couldn’t he just patch the hole in the boat?
Why do we drive on a parkway and park on a driveway?
Why is it called an asteroid when it’s in the hemisphere and a hemorrhoid when its in your ass?
What happens if you get scared half to death…..twice?
If a grown man says he is gay, he’s coming out of the closet. So, if a grown midget says hes gay, is he coming out of the cupboard?
Why is the word abbreviation so long?
Why doesn’t glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
Can fat people go skinny dipping?
Why do you have to “put your two cents in”, but it’s only a “penny for your thoughts?”
Why are you IN a movie, but you’re ON T.V.?
If corn oil comes from corn, and vegetable oil comes from vegetables, where does baby oil come from?
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, then why the fuck is there a song about him?
Why do doctors leave the room after they ask you to change? They’re gonna see you naked anyways.
When companies ship Styrofoam, what do they pack it in?
Would a fly without wings be called a walk?
If the common house fly only lives for roughly 24 hours, why can’t it find something more useful to do with its short life then land on MY DAMN BUFFALO WINGS!!!!!!
What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t work? A stick.
If Wil E. Coyote had all this money to buy all this to all this Acme stuff, why didn’t he just buy dinner?
Can you cry underwater?
Why is the name for a PHOBIA OF LONG WORDS…….Hippopotomonstrusesqupedaliophobia?????
Why does QUICK sand work so slowly?
Why do you recite at a play but you play at a recital?
If con is the opposite of pro, then whats the opposite of progress?
Why is lemon juice mostly artificial ingredients, but dish soap is 100% real lemons?
How deep would the ocean be if there weren’t sponges in it?
Tell a man that there are 400 billion stars in the sky and he’ll believe you, but if you tell him that there is wet paint on a bench, he has to touch it?
Why do we wait till a pig is dead to “cure” it?
Why do we put suits in a garment back, but put garments in a suitcase?
Is it a little unnerving that what doctors do is called “practice”?
Why do local news networks report power outages on T.V.?
Is it possible to be totally partial?
If a parsley farmer got sued, could they garnish his wages?
IF YOU SHOOT A MIME SHOULD YOU USE A SILENCER?
If it’s zero degrees outside today (which we are in Kansas people), and its supposed to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold will it be?
What do you call a defective milk dud?
Do radioactive cats have 18 lives?
Why do psychics have to ask your name, and count the money your paying them with…..on that matter, why do they even need money. Let me be a “psychic”, the lotto is mine….forever.
Why do they sterilize needles for a lethal injection?
Why are they called apartments when there all stuck together?
Why doesn’t Tarzan have a beard?
Why are there interstates in Hawaii?
Why do stores advertise for “free” gifts, aren’t all gifts free?
Why do feet smell and noses run?
If a book about “failures” doesn’t sell, is it a success?
Why is there Braille at drive-up ATM’S?
Isn’t Disneyland a person trap operated by a mouse?
Why does a ringtone download from itunes cost almost twice as much as a full song for half as much music?
If a mute person “talks” in his sleep, does he use his hands?
Why does the disclaimer for “ALLSTATE” auto insurance say “not available in “ALL STATES”?
If girls who work at Hooters have big breasts, then do girls with one leg work at IHOP?
Why is everyone driving faster then you an idiot, and everyone driving slower a moron?
Is it rude for a deaf or mute person to sign (talk) with his / her mouth full?
If a transvestite goes missing, do you put his / her picture on a carton of half and half?
